This week on the bus: COME ON LADY!!!

HEY! You! In the front!

Listen, I'm sure that you have to scratch that itch, but for the love of God! Do you have to stand up in the front of the bus and stick you hand down the back of your pants to do it?

Are you fucking kidding me?!?!

Can't you just move around in your seat and use the friction method.

What is wrong with outside of the pants, is it the skin to skin that you need?

And yet...I can't look away.

Stankonia...

I was walking through the Mall of America last weekend and had this little exchange about the smells of different stores.

Walking by Abercrombie

Me: YUCK! What is that smell? Oh...it's Abercrombie.
T: You don't like it?
Me: NO! GROSS!
T: I don't think it smells that bad.
Me: Your face smells bad...
T: You're stupid.

Walking into Sephora

Me: Ooooooo...I like the smell in here.
T: Really, it smells like the other store.
Me: No way. The smell in this store makes me want to have sex with it.
T: You're stupid.

So...I guess the moral of the story is...if you smell, people won't have sex with you.